Till It's Gone
by Devon Farmer
Summary: Kitty Pryde goes to Kurt Wagner's grave and recalls the events of the one night that changed her life. One Shot.


**Till It's Gone.**

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters featured in this story. The characters featured in this fan fiction are Copyright Marvel, and are used without permission. This is a none profit story, written for fun and entertainment.

Rating: M for Mature. For Violence and Sexual References.

Even if it were the middle of the day, it was dark. Clouds filled the sky, and one could catch a hint that it was about to rain, it was already spitting. A lone teen, dressed in black, with one simple red rose in her grasp made her way to a grave she knew all too well, she had come to it every day, at the same point of time, where she would remain until she couldn't take staying any longer. But this day was different, it had been one month since she had first come to this grave, the one month anniversary of his death. Her face was already drenched with tears, her make-up was ruined, but he would have thought her beautiful anyway. She missed him, she had missed him since the first day he had left. She missed the smile that was always plastered on his cute face. She missed his soft golden eyes. His laugh. She missed how he would appear before her, startling her. The touch of his indigo fur on her pale skin. She missed everything about him.

She had finally reached her destination, a simple tombstone, but below it was a sea of flowers, notes and letters, and a few photographs. The one that caught her eye was the one right in the middle, a picture of her and him, with their arms over each others shoulder. She knelt down, placing her rose by the photo. Today, she decided she would come early, for his friends and loved ones would be flooding the cemetery. She looked up and read the tomb stone.

R.I.P.

Kurt M. Wagner

Gone but never forgotten.

More tears came to her eyes when she read it, he was truly gone, but she would never forget him. She got up again, and looked at the picture. A smile came to her face as tears continued to stream down her face,.

"Hi Fuzzy. It's me, your Kätzchen. I decided to be a little earlier today, so I could have this private talk with you before everyone else shows up. I haven't actually told you this, but Lance and I are through... We've been through for a long time now. If I had the guts, I would have done it so long ago. I'm sorry I never told you. It was so hard doing it without you. I'm glad he understood my reason, maybe we might remain friends, but it's doubtful, he only wanted me as his girlfriend, nothing less.

Amanda moved away. She told me before she left that you broke up with her. Why didn't you tell me, Kurt? She didn't tell me what your reason was, she just assumed I "knew by know." It's clear why you did. I'm just sad that you weren't alive long enough to go through with it.

Things aren't the same around the mansion now that your gone. It's really depressing and boring. No Fuzzy Elf to turn to when you're feeling down, and believe me, I'm depressed every day."

Kitty Pryde took a minute to whip her tears, she knew it was no use, that no matter how much she tried, her tears would always be there.

"You know, you'd probably say you wouldn't be able to tell that I was crying right now, because of the rain, but, it's very clear, they're like scars. Oh Kurt... I miss you so much...

People have tried so hard to cheer me up. Bobby Drake has been pulling off some of your pranks, in your honor. He even went as far as to paint his skin blue, and wake me up early one day. Although it made things worse, I thanked him later. I've heard them talking, they say I'm the one who has taken this the hardest.

Mister Logan doesn't let your mother come here, but that doesn't stop her. I once came here one day to see that I was already at your grave, another Kitty. I wasn't frightened. I knew it was her, we saw each other, and I think that was the first time I had ever felt the same way as an enemy. She came over to me and embraced me, and I hugged back.

You didn't deserve this, and what even hurts me more, is that it's all my fault. I knew we said it wouldn't be a date, since I was with Lance, and I thought you were with Amanda, but it turned out to be one. That one night made my life, but at the same time, destroyed it. I wouldn't be the same if it weren't for that night. I knew we promised each other we would never talk about it to anyone so we wouldn't get in trouble, but I couldn't help it. I told Lance. He acted like he already knew, and wasn't angry about it. He said that he knew something like that was bound to happen.

They say things happen for a reason. But I can't help but think if it weren't for my selfishness, you'd still be alive, holding me."

She gulped, it was so hard bringing up these memories. The greatest memory of her life was the worst at the same time.

"I love you, Kurt Wagner. I have loved you ever since that incident with Rogue. I never wanted to admit it to you, because I was afraid of what you would say, and that our friendship would disappear. I thought you had moved on, that you only wanted to remain friends, so I kept my feelings locked up. If I had kept them locked up, for just one night longer. You would still be with me.

The professor is the only one who knows, but hasn't actually talked to me about it. I think I will talk to him tonight. I need to. No body else knows. I've kept it to myself.

Kurt. I'm pregnant. You are the father, of course. I was a virgin that night, and you were my first. I have not been with another man since then, I don't know if I ever want to. If it weren't for that event, you'd be alive. If we were never caught, or... If we could have even waited till we got back to the mansion, even if we would have been stopped by the Professor, it would have been all worth it, because you would be alive.

We thought it would be safe if we went somewhere private, so the Professor would never know. I didn't think Kurt, if I could have waited, or..."

Kitty then burst into a fit of tears, she rubbed furiously at her eyes, and dropped to her knees.

That fateful night, one month ago, Kurt Wagner and Kitty Pryde had agreed to go see a movie together, as friends. That's what they attended it do be, but both were oblivious to the feelings both held for each other. One faithful kiss brought their worlds together. They practically kissed each other at the same time. One kiss, then another. The two were madly in love with each other. They scrambled around to the back lot, lip locked. They were unaware of any watchful eyes, if any. Kurt had his Inducer on, making him look like any regular teen boy. When they thought they were alone, the went even farther then kissing. Kurt slid his hand up her shirt, and Kitty didn't hold back. She grabbed his shirt, and took it off. They knew what they were about to do, and they both thought it was wrong, but they couldn't stop. Kitty used her ability to phase her and his clothing of their bodies, what she didn't know was, she phased her hand through his Inducer, the both didn't know that Kurt was in his true form. Kurt inserted his into her, the both only separating from their lip lock for air. Their eyes were closed the whole time, anyone could have been watching, but they both didn't care. If they knew what was going to happen next, they would have stopped. In the silence of the night, Kitty Pryde heard a chilling sound. A gun shot. Her eyes snapped open, she was looking into Kurt's eyes, they looked cold. He fell limp in her arms. She couldn't hear anything around her, except for her heart beating. The weight of his cold body was to much for her, he fell to the ground. Dead. She heard voices. She looked up to see a barrel of a pistol was pointed at the body of the blue elf. "Demon" was called out into the night sky. "This demon was raping this young girl." Kitty was speechless. The amount of tears in her eyes were to much to bear. She cried out. The man noticed the mistake he had made, and ran. He got away. After a long time of crying into his chest. Kitty was approached by the man she knew as Xavier, and no one else. The rest was a blur to her.

Back at the cemetery, Kitty Pryde was on the ground. Crying. In her arms was the photograph of the two. Behind her were the approaching figures of her family, her family from the Institute. She stopped crying long enough, to slowly, and quietly whimper one last thing to her beloved.

"I love you Kurt Wagner."

You don't know what you've got till it's gone.


End file.
